Innocent game [FirstKhaotung/GeminiFourth/OhmNanon/PondPhuwin...] - 2/1 First - I broke you (2024)

 

First's POV
After Mix revealed the truth to me, I felt like vomiting. I lived so long in a false hope and I have never been able to move on. Everyone is pushing me to Khaotung for their selfish reasons. Neo won't have to worry so much and focus on his life instead and Mix will finally get rid of me.
Khaotung and I actually have a lot in common. We exist as burdens to others but can't get out of their lives. But Mix's bravery to tell me everything made me realize I should not be a coward and talk to Khaotung as well. He has never confessed because of the fear of certain rejection and I was never brave to confront him about his feelings in order to spare him from pain but Mix made me realize false hopes hurt much more than cruel truth. 
The next day I decided to visit him and I came across Neo who opened the door. 
"I can't believe you have the audacity to come here. Khaotung may have not heard you but I clearly had. I know you have your own troubles but that doesn't mean you have the right to hurt him." He was right. He was so right I couldn't say anything back. I just put on a hurtful smile. 
"Thank you... for taking care of him. I'm sorry for the bother." He frowned at me. 
"Do you think so low of me that I see my best friend as a burden? Just because you need help from others doesn't make you a burden you know. It's better than keeping your issues inside while making your friends worried with secrets." 
"Enough of the philosophy. Can I see him?" 
"No." 
"But I-." 
See Also
petemis - Read stories petemisInnocent game [FirstKhaotung/GeminiFourth/OhmNanon/PondPhuwin...] - 2/4 Pond - Can I trust you now?Better Pertemis - Sankarea329 - Wattpad
"No." If he didn't work out, I could get there with violence.
"Neo, let him." I saw Khaotung behind him who was wiping his red eyes. 
"Did you at least take your pills?" Khao nodded to answer his question and I felt even worse. Neo frowned at me one more time and moved so I could go inside. Khao lured me to his bedroom while he asked Neo to stay outside. 
"I don't remember your room to be so messy..." 
"You haven't even visited me in this place." I looked nervously at him and saw how devastated he was. Dark bags under his eyes and empty gaze. 
"So? What did you want? Must be something big when you found time for me." I played with my fingers nervously. 
"Can you... possibly tell me about your feelings?" 
"What?! Wait... you know something?" I nodded. 
"The way you acted... I knew right away you think about me more than just as a friend." 
"So you let me drown in it for so long..." This is too familiar and I was surprised how much I could connect to him. 
"I-I'm sorry for everything! I thought... that rejecting you without you even telling me about your feelings would be wrong so I waited until you'd make a move but it didn't happen and I decided to avoid you to help you fall out of love but now I see how cruel it was." 
"I see... well, I should find a strength to at least tell you... and what made you tell me this?" I looked away. 
"I just learned Mix has been dating someone for a half year and it hurt because I still hoped... well, I realized I did exactly the same thing to you and wanted to fix it... I understand if you don't want to see me again." He looked at me in shock and I hope he didn't notice the tear falling down of my right eye but when I looked back at him, his hand approached my cheek and wiped the tear.
"I always hoped you'd shed a tear for me..." His smile was hurting him and I could see how much he was holding back his emotions. 
"~ I'm going under and this time I fear there's no one to save me
This all or nothing really got a way of driving me crazy
I need somebody to heal
Somebody to know
Somebody to have
Somebody to hold
It's easy to say
But it's never the same
I guess I kinda liked the way you numbed all the pain...~"
"~... Now the day bleeds
Into nightfall
And you're not here
To get me through it all
I let my guard down
And then you pulled the rug
I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved...~"
(Cr: Lewis Capaldi)
When I sang, he joined me and screamed his lungs out as I intended to. Neo kept asking if everything was alright but we continued singing together and I was finally able to see his smile after so many years. 
"We are such broken losers, aren't we?" 
"Damn right, hahah..." But his smile quickly faded away. 
"I-I still want to tell you about my feelings... Do you remember the kissing game we played as teenagers? When I got to taste your lips... I couldn't stop thinking about you and wanted to get closer to you but soon I realized I'm just not as wanted as I thought..." 
"Ten years... are you living with this feeling for ten years?" He nodded without looking into my eyes and I found my way to his hand. 
"Actually, no one has ever confessed to me like this and... it warms my cold heart. But I hurt you, Khao, and I can't tell if that won't happen again..." He looked at me with a surprised look. 
"What are you suggesting right now?" I smirked. 
"I think we could give it a chance... if you were in-." What happened next, I just didn't expect. He quickly put his hands on my cheeks and kissed me as if he was scared I'd disappear again. It wasn't like this the first time, now emotions were involved and it felt surprisingly different from any other kiss I had before. In a good way. Now it felt like something very important for our new beginning... 
"Okay, I'm coming in- Oh my God!! Get off him!!" I put my hands off Tung's messy hair and he pulled out before Neo could break our kiss himself. 
"I-I'll call you later!!" I grabbed my things and quickly ran away before Neo could strangle me with his hands. I'm sorry, Khao!